Sunday, September 25, 2005

A Woman Who Reads

My mom sent this to me today. As an English teacher I rather enjoyed it:).

One morning the husband returns after several hours of fishing and decides to take a nap. Although not familiar with the lake, the wife decides to take the boat out. She motors out a short distance, anchors and begins to read her book.

Along comes a game warden in his boat. He pulls up alongside the woman and says, "Good morning, Ma'am. What are you doing?"

"Reading a book," she replies. (thinking, "Isn't that obvious?")

"You're in a restricted fishing area", he informs her.

"I'm sorry officer, but I'm not fishing, I'm reading.

"Yes, but you have all the equipment. For all I know you could start at any moment. I'll have to take you in and write you up.

"If you do that, I'll have to charge you with sexual assault," says the

"But I have not even touched you," says the game warden.

"That's true, but you have all the equipment. For all I know you could start at any moment."

"Have a nice day ma'am," and he left.


Never argue with a woman who reads. It is likely she can also think.

Tuesday, September 13, 2005

A Call; A Frustration

I was having a conversation about boys with my roommate and her fiance this evening and they said "Whatever happened to that one guy (whose name will be spared in the case that he ever happens to find my blog)." Good question, I thought to myself. I met a guy at a friend's wedding. He was a really nice, neat Catholic guy. We talked for a while, danced for a while (he can do a mean Cotten Eyed Joe) and talked some more. I had a really great time getting to know him, casually invited him over for rosary one night, and then he left, never to be heard from again.

Some of my friends are of the opinion that I should call this guy up and invite him to hang out with us, as a group thing. Herein lies my frustration (I told FJ I would use that word!!). I have conditioned myself, with good reason mind you, not to call a boy that I like and ask him to do something. Why, you may ask? Cause it sounds kindof dumb when I put it like that, even to me. The why is not in the asking; I invite people over to our house all the time. The why is in the unspoken hope somewhere deep inside that he will say yes and he'll be all excited about coming to see me and getting to spend time with me. The why is that when this little senario doesn't play out the way that I think it should in my head (cause come on - I am a pretty cool person to hang with, let me tell you!:) I get really sad and bummed out and the whole situation is much worse that when I was just thinking, "Oh, that boy is neat, I'd like to get to know him better."

So many things happen inside a girl's head. I wish that they did not (although they can be fun for a while . . .). But this isn't reality.

All right then, what is reality? Reality is that guys ask girls for a reason. They are supposed to do the initiating because they don't have all this head stuff going on. (totally made that up, but have sources from a few guys on that one). If a guy asks, we, as girls know that they like us, or are at least intruigued by us and they want to know more. The problem is that this doesn't seem to happen very often and therein lay my call. I don't just want to see guys out there. I want to see MEN! Men who will put aside a fear of rejection in order to ask a nice girl out on a date. I have seen far too many wonderful young ladies sit on the sidelines of the dating world all because no one would see fit to face the fire and ask them out. Most of the time, we are nice people (granted, sometimes we can be pissy but that's definitely not all the time). All you men have to do is just ask!

It is sad to me that I may never get to talk to the cute really fun guy that danced the Chicken Dance with me at a wedding this summer. I wish he would call . . .